Rabbetting On: And so the diet starts again... (again)

Hello, and Happy New Year! Welcome to my first column of 2024 and it's only one day later than I originally planned (blame the hangover.)

2023 was a bit of a strange year for me (in many ways), I didn't really achieve anything I set out to do but I made great strides towards to doing them.

It was my planning year, if you will.

Read more: Lifestyle

For example: I didn't attend a burlesque class, but I booked one (and didn't show up because I had a Menty B). And although I didn't write the book I intended to write in 2022, I at least threw out ideas.

Ok, so I didn't *technically* clear out my blasted (and expensive) storage unit but I did go there, at least twice. So stop judging me!

But much like the New Year, my resolution to lose weight has come around time and time again, with little to no avail. I'm starting this year heavier than I've ever been with all the self-esteem and sex appeal of a swamp rat.

You see my weight loss goals aren't grounded in vanity but rather "diet or get diabetes." So, it's about time I got my act together and shifted the weight for good.

I've been to the doctor, I've cried and bought the recipe books - I have all the elements required to make it happen once and for all. But the truth is I'm a bit scared - who will I be if I'm not fat? What will happen to my self-loathing sense of humour? Is the world ready for the unstoppable force that would be Abigail Rabbett without an eating disorder?

I've been this way for so long now that I can't imagine myself any other way. Maybe I should ask AI to create a picture of me looking like Pamela Anderson and use that as motivation. Yes, good idea I'll stick it on the fridge.

My brother is getting married in July and I am acutely aware that as things stand, I am not bridesmaid-ready. I would like to not run (slowly) in the opposite direction when a photographer comes near me, and I desperately want to feel confident in my ritzy bejewelled frock. So I have no choice, 2024 is the year to find out what losing weight finally looks like (she wrote with false confidence.) I'm poised and ready to tackle this thing head-on, to start a life free from the shackles of potatoes and pot bellies.

The first step is finding a healthy alternative to my heart-stopping Haribo addiction. So if anyone has any genuine ideas, my DMs are open.

And to anyone who has decided to kick the eating addiction in 2024. Good luck, and may the odds (and the scales) be ever in your favour (and mine.)